NovelSisters

watching, reading, and writing stories

The Vacation Syndrome

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As Summer begins and many families head out on their summer vacations, I thought I’d share a short story I wrote and give a brief warning to avoid the ‘vacation syndrome.’ I hope you enjoy and learn something too.

When I was young, we usually took a trip somewhere every summer, and sometimes even in the fall too. When going on a trip, it’s easy to get the ‘vacation syndrome.’ This attitude could be described as one of expecting certain privileges, and feelings. In many cases a person with vacation syndrome expects everything to go smoothly, to be relaxing, and to be just as one wants. I mean this is a vacation right? You worked hard for this, right? So everything should be perfect. Unfortunately this is rarely the case, and often times ‘vacation syndrome’ hinders us from actually having a good time on a trip, and instead makes it more stressful. This short story gives an example of a trip with some obvious ‘vacation syndrome’ going on and I hope it encourages you to stop complaining and instead be thankful for your vacation and enjoy it and the time you get with your family.

Thanksgiving Cruise

I think it’s a bit ironic that the only cruise I’ve ever been on was set during the week of Thanksgiving. However, this is one of the trips that I can remember a lot of unthankfulness and many symptoms of ‘vacation syndrome.’ But it did teach me a lesson. And it is one trip I’ll never forget.

We started our cruise from Galveston, TX. We should have been very thankful that we didn’t have to fly all the way to Florida to get on a cruise, but unfortunately, we were late getting to the ship, and this caused some bad attitudes.

“If only we would have left when I said we should,” Dad grumbled as he parked the car.

We hurried to unload our many suitcases and glanced up thankfully at the tall ship. At least we weren’t being left behind… yet.

“I have to go to the bathroom,” Alicia said with a whine, I’ve been holding it for fifteen minutes.”

“Just a little longer,” Mom assured her. “We’ll go sign in and I’m sure they have a bathroom somewhere.”

“Come on already,” Jonny said with frustration. “I don’t want the ship to leave without us.”

I agreed with Jonny and started following him towards the wharf, with my wheeled suitcase in tow. We soon found the check-in area, and I was a bit relieved to find out that we weren’t the only family that had gotten there late. But there were some consequences. As Dad signed papers, I stared up at the ship’s deck high above us, and spotted groups of passengers clumped together in formation at the lifeboats. They were undergoing a mandatory safety training, and we were missing it.

“You’ll have to do the late training this evening,” the check in person said.

I shook my head; of course it would be my family that missed the safety training. I was pretty sure we weren’t going to experience a Titanic like adventure, but I still wanted to be prepared in case some kind of emergency happened. Now, while everyone else was having fun, we’d have to stand like a bunch of idiots out on the deck and do our safety training, basically singling ourselves out as the irresponsible ones. But it could be worse, at least we didn’t have to do it alone, there were several other families who were late too.

* * * * *

As our trip got underway, I found myself spending a lot of time in our cabin, a tiny room with two bunk beds, and a TV. We watched a lot of old cartoons that I hadn’t even known had existed. There was Adam Ant, and Mighty Mouse, and the Spiderman movie was played continually on one channel.

“Uh, I wish they played some better cartoons,” I whined. “Like Scooby Doo. There’s nothing good on these channels.”

“I’m bored of TV,” Jonny joined in.

“Yeah, I’m so bored.” I knew complaining about being bored was kind of dumb: I was staying in the room watching the same cartoons over and over instead of getting out on the ship. But I didn’t want to make any effort; I just wanted to be entertained. Thus the ‘vacation epidemic’ grew. Every little thing there was to complain about somehow got mentioned.

“Uh, I wish that stupid rule about not swimming in the adult pool never existed,” I complained.

“Yeah, that current is so fun to play in, and it’s not as crowded as the kid pool,” Jonny added.

“And we’re all good swimmers, it’s not like we need a life guard or an adult to watch us, we can take care of ourselves,” I added.

“You know what I’m sick of?” Alicia asked.

I turned my head lazily to face her, “What?”

“Those lady fingers that they put in all the desserts, they taste disgusting and I’m so tired of having to pull them out of everything.”

“Speaking of food,” Jonny added. “Did you know they ran out of free ice cream in the lounge today? Talk about disappointing.”

This kind of talk would go on and on, and what did we do; sit and watch more boring TV.

* * * * *

Thankfully, this was not the case every day. On the days we were stopped at an island or foreign country, there were chances to explore, and get off the boat. But complaining fests still crept upon us. The worst stop was in Cozumel, Mexico. For some reason, everyone found something to complain about that day, and even though we were all a part of doing something very enjoyable, we focused in on the parts that didn’t meet our expectations.

I climbed into the taxi after Dad had finally flagged down a taxi van that was big enough for our whole family. It had been a long day. We had split up this time with Mom and me going to a ranch to ride horses, and the Dad taking the other kids to the beach. “So what did y’all do?” I asked Alicia.

“Well the boys went swimming and climbed a big blow up iceberg, but it was too far out for me, so Dad stayed with me on the beach. It’s no fun being small. The iceberg looked like fun.”

“Yeah it was,” Jonny said. “But you got to go on the bounce trampoline and do flips.”

“But you got to do both,” Alicia whined. “I wish I could have gone with you Lydia. I would have rather ridden horses.”

“Well it wasn’t too exciting. I was separated from Mom for most of the ride. My horse wouldn’t go at all, even when I kicked like the guide said, he wouldn’t listen. He just walked when the horses in front of him walked. I really wanted to gallop with the others, but when I tried, the horse was still really slow.”

“So you didn’t have fun?” Alicia asked.

“No, it was fun. There was a cool show they did for us where this rider danced with his horse. And we saw a lot of ruins on the trail ride… they looked fake to me though.”

“Well I’m starving,” Brain said. “I can’t wait to get back to the ship. Dad didn’t want to pay for any of the food at the beach. He said it was too expensive.”

Just then we pulled up to the curb. I glanced out the window at the ocean in the distance; there was our cruise ship, still as a sunken log. “Good timing then,” I said. “Let’s go eat.”

We jumped out of the van, ready to get back to our temporary home aboard the ship, but as we started moving towards the ship, a yell disrupted the evening air.

I turned back to see Dad yelling at our Taxi driver, saying something about the amount was wrong and that it shouldn’t be that expensive to drive three miles. I kept walking, hoping the other vacationers returning to the ship didn’t think we were part of the same family. I hated this day, not only had the horse ride been quite disappointing, but now my Dad was having a breakdown about money for the whole world to see. At that moment, it seemed like I was on the worst vacation ever.

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A Family’s Impact

 

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This past weekend I got to spend time with my family in Florida and remember and honor my grandfather who passed away earlier this year. As people retold stories and memories that they had shared with my grandfather, I realized what an impact one life can have. My grandpa lived a little over 80 years on this earth, but he touched so many lives. He had an impact on relatives separated by generations and hundreds of miles, and even those outside his family were impacted by his quiet and faithful life. He was dedicated to God and his family, he provided for a wife and 5 children, he stayed married to the same woman for 60 years and he served wherever he went. On the plane ride home, I overheard a conversation some high schoolers where having about their own parents, about how many divorces and marriages and kids they had. One girl claimed that everyone in her family except her parents had been remarried at some point. It made me sad that this is considered normal now days, but it also made me thankful for my grandpa. He led by example, he lived faithfully each day and that had an impact on his children, and grandchildren and it will continue to impact his great grandkids and the generations in the future. Because he was faithful, it was easier for the next generation in my family to also stay faithful. I’m so glad to see so many of my uncles, aunts, and cousins following Jesus and still living faithfully to one husband or wife.

So thanks for running your race well grandpa! I hope I can do the same.

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Planned Quality Time

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What does it mean to have quality time with someone else? I don’t know if you’ve heard of the 5 Love Languages or not, but one of my Love Languages is Quality Time. That’s a big way of how I connect with people and show them I care about them. And I feel loved when someone spends uninterrupted time with me.

I just got to spend the last few days with family from out of town and it got me thinking about how I spend time with the people around me. When I plan a time to get together with someone, my brain switches to Quality Time mode. I am more purposeful, I try not to be late to the scheduled time together, and I strive to enjoy it all, because it is limited. Oftentimes I ignore texts or calls, because I’m spending quality time with this person. I’ve dedicated this time to being with this person, and not to answer messages on my phone.

But sometimes, my plan doesn’t work. We schedule time together, but the expectation and reality don’t mesh. Maybe something comes up, or we don’t do the thing we had planned on doing, or there was no plan at all, other than just meeting up, so at the end I’m not sure how to feel.

So after this past week of a lot of unplanned time with family, I’ve realized that it’s good to plan and schedule times to be with a person. It can help me personally to step away from distractions and enjoy time with someone I care about. But there’s another side to this. What if I don’t have anything planned? What if I’m just with someone to be with them? This is the norm in my family on a given day. We all have work, chores, commitments, things to do, and if we were trying to have uninterrupted quality time, those things wouldn’t get done. So sometimes we have to have our quality family time while doing other things. Like talking while doing dishes, or hearing about each other’s day while eating dinner, or pausing the movie so someone can answer a phone call. Sometimes life isn’t perfect and the quality time I long for, just doesn’t happen the way I planned. And that’s okay.

What I have to remember most, is not to make it about me. If I’m focused on how I feel, if I’m having fun with the person, if we’re getting to do everything I was planning to do, then I can miss out on the best part, just being with my friend. If I focus on them instead of myself and my plan, then I enjoy our time together so much more, no matter if it was interrupted, cut short, or we did the thing we had planned to do.

So in conclusion, plans are useful, but it’s not what quality time is about. Quality Time is best when it’s focused on the person you’re spending time with, and not on what you’re doing with them.

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Tis the Season

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The holidays can be a blur of activity no matter what you are celebrating. It seems like time speeds up and the amount of commitments do too, so that you have less time to do more things. This year I’m adding my brother’s wedding to the craziness of my Christmas season.But something my soon to be sister-in-law said the other day has stuck with me. “We’re trying to find joy in the midst of busyness.” Instead of looking at the long list of to-dos and getting overwhelmed, she is trying to find joy in each task. I think this attitude is applicable to more than just wedding craziness, but can and should be applied in the holiday season too.

It’s so easy to get wrapped up in all the details: parties, presents, dinners, decorations, traveling, and whatever else your holiday includes. These things can crowd out what’s really important.

So here are a few things that are really important about this season, at least to me. Your list may differ, but I would encourage you to figure out what they are, and try to focus on them this season.

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1. Family. Even if I don’t get my sister/brother/parents the perfect gift, we’re still family, and we still love each other. I want to focus more on spending time with my family while we’re together and enjoying them. We tell jokes together, watch funny movies, and play board games and those memories have been more precious to me than any gift I’ve received. So I don’t want to miss out on spending time with my family this year, and showing them how much I love them, through the time I spend with them.

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2. Christ. To me, Christmas isn’t Christmas without Christ. The whole reason I have hope, joy, peace, life, love, or anything good, is because of God. He showed his love for me, by sending Jesus into this broken and messed up world. He experienced all the heartaches of this place, and He made a way for me to be saved from it. He showed the greatest love by dying in my place, taking my punishment, and being separated from the Father. So now, I don’t have to. His precious gift of Himself, is what Christmas is all about. And if I forget that, I forget what’s most important.

 

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3. Love. This really stems from my other important things. Christ’s love for me is the reason I can love my family, even when they disappoint me, or love a friend even when they get on my nerves. God’s love reached out to His enemies, and that love, working in me, should reach out to strangers, outcasts, even enemies. I’ve heard that love is the most powerful thing in the world, and when it comes from God, I’d say that sounds pretty accurate. God’s love changes everything. It’s changed my life, and it is still changing this world.

So there’s my list of important things for this crazy season. I’m going to try to focus on loving others, including my family, from an attitude of thankfulness for how Christ has loved me. And I’m pretty sure that will help me have joy instead of stress this year. I hope you have a very Merry Christmas and enjoy the holidays too.

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What I’m Thankful For #2

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As you might have seen in a previous post, I am trying to remind myself to be thankful this month. It probably helps that in church yesterday we talked about being grateful and how important it is.

So today I am grateful for my family and friends. I don’t want to sound corny when I say this, I think most people are thankful for the close relationships they enjoy with other people, it’s part of being human. But I really am grateful for the people I’ve gotten to know.

You see, I’ve grown up in the same city, and the only times I moved was when I was 2 years old, and briefly for college. But I came home to visit so often, it was like I never left. So I really feel a deep connection for the people around me because a lot of them I really have known for over a decade.

These lasting relationships are a real blessing to me, it reminds me that just because some people move on, and our friendship only lasts for a couple of months or years, there will always be people that don’t move away, and even the people that do leave can be visited and reconnected with.

I guess the whole reason I’m thinking of this is because my brother just had a couples shower for his wedding in December and seeing all the old and new family friends at the shower brought on a wave of gratitude. There are so many people that love me and my family, and it encourages me to know they’ll be there for us in the happy moments of life, and the hard ones.

And I’m thankful for my family, because man we’ve been through a lot together and we’re still close. We can even fit 11 people in one house (8 of which are sharing 1 bathroom) and we still love each other. That’s a blessing and I’m thankful for it.

So in honor of my family and friends, I will share a short story I wrote about my childhood. Some of the details may be fabricated, but in essence the story is true.

Enjoy!

Barton Creek

“Are y’all ready to go?” Dad called from the front door.

“I’m ready!” I said happily. I had just changed into blue jeans, a red t-shirt with the logo of some obscure camp stitched across it.

Dad looked back into the house, not seeing anyone else yet.

“I think Mom’s in the bathroom.”

Dad nodded and headed inside to see if he could help make the preparation process go faster for anyone.

I sat on the front porch step and watched bees buzzing around our rosebush. It was an early summer afternoon, with large cumulus clouds spread across the vast Texas sky. A blue jay hopped from one branch on our massive ash tree to the next.

My Dad never liked the ash trees in our front yard. He said the neighborhood only planted them so there would be big nice looking trees in a short amount of time, but they didn’t live long, and their roots grew close to the surface, so unless you had covered them while they were young, it looked like an anaconda was living in your lawn.

I stared up at the tree, it might not be the best kind of tree, but I loved the shade it gave in the summertime, its branches spread perfectly, drooping slightly to bring the maximum amount of sun blockage. The only downside in my opinion was the fall, when thousands of pointy seeds fell from its branches along with the leaves. Those pokey seeds got stuck on everything and occasionally would break the skin, if you stepped on them barefoot.

The door opened behind me and I turned to see the rest of the family ready for our outing. Everyone had tennis shoes and long pants for the journey into the woods.

“Alright, let’s go!” Dad said enthusiastically. He had this tendency to get extremely enthusiastic about something in a funny way, like he was trying to entertain us with his zeal.

We all started marching down the sidewalk, till we reached the small street. We turned left and headed towards the dead end, with large reflective signs that stated “Private Property,” and “No Admittance,” and other such statements of discouragement. We ignored the signs as always, I think they had been left up from a time when the land actually belonged to someone. Now it was like a private trail for our neighborhood’s residents.

“Remember when we filmed Fat Man here?” Jonny said excitedly. He was referring to a home movie we had made parodying Batman. Instead we had made the hero Fat Man and had stuffed pillows into our neighbor’s shirt to make him chubbier. One of the scenes in the movie had Fat Man battling a ‘robot’ played by another neighbor, in the woods.

I laughed, “Oh yeah, I remember that. Remember that Drew wasn’t wearing his shoes.”

“Yeah, that was funny,” Jonny said.

We continued on, passing fields of cactus and tall amber grasses. A few yellow flowers poked out of the undergrowth. Then we ventured into shaded areas where the cedar trees grew close together and formed a canopy over the trail. A few side trails appeared, but we continued down the main one headed for the creek, as we had so many times before.

Jonny came across a large stick a few feet off the trail and decided right away that he needed a walking stick. He marched along for several minutes like a he was Louis or Clark on a grand expedition, but he soon got bored with the stick and decided he’d much rather have the use of his hands for climbing. He left it on the side of the trail, for yet another adventurer to find and use.

We stopped for a couple of minutes at a short tree that was perfect for climbing. The two boys scurried up into the branches and Mom took pictures. I picked a few yellow flowers instead and put them in my hair.

“Y’all ready to keep going?” Dad asked a little impatiently. He was ready to see the river, and maybe stick his feet in the cool water.

The boys leapt out of the branches, landing with a thud into the soft earth.

We turned and continued deeper into the woods, finally after several minutes we came to a stop at a crossroads. One trail wove down a gentler slope to the creek bed, the other rose to the crest of a hill and gave a nice view of the sloping landscape before plummeting down a steep drop to the bottom. Both ended in the same place, so either could be taken.

“So which trail do we want to take?” Dad asked.

“Mountain Goat Trail!” Jonny and I shouted together.

As you might have guessed, this was the steeper trail. We swerved to the right and walked up an incline to the lookout point at the top of the hill. The tops of cedar trees could be seen in any direction. The rolling slopes of the Hill Country looked like a giant green ocean that had been frozen in time, in the middle of a heavy storm.

After staring out at the countryside, we continued down the steep drop. It wasn’t so much like a cliff, more like a giant staircase with some steep places where you needed to be a little more careful. The trail disappeared as well, the large rocky “steps” were the only way down, and no matter how far to the right or left you went, as long as you went down, you would eventually end up hitting the other trail.

I hopped down the rocks, pretending I was actually a mountain goat. My shoes gripped the rocks easily and I felt like I belonged here.

Jonny and Alicia joined me in jumping around as we headed down the steep trail.

Mom and Dad took things a little slower, making sure not to fall.

As we gathered on the intersecting trail, we stopped to stare down the steep drop. This drop was more like a cliff and ended in a little gully where water from further up the hill would rush down towards the creek. No one would go down there unless they were crazy.

While I stared down at the deep drop, my ears picked up a faint sound. “Shh, listen,” I commanded.

The family stopped talking and we all stood still. Faintly, through the trees, we heard the soft roar of the creek.

I smiled eagerly, “I can hear it!”

Our steps quickened as we neared the bottom of the hillside. It had rained a week before and the water was going to be high. As we neared the end of the trail, the sound grew to a loud swooshing sound.

Finally I caught a glimpse of the water. It looked grey and murky, clothed with a bubbly white shawl. “There it is! There it is!” I said excitedly.

“Whoa it’s huge!” Jonny said.

We all scampered down for a closer look, dodging the wreckage the waters had left in its rush to the creek: branches, leaves, even an old shoe. All of a sudden we were no longer on a soft dirt trail, but on white rocks, rubbed smooth by the water’s touch. We came to a stop at the water’s edge and stood in awe of the powerful rapids before us.

Water careened over the stones, and bubbled as it collided with trapped logs. The roar wasn’t deafening but if forced us to increase the volume of our voice to be heard.

Alicia grabbed my hand and stared amazedly at the mighty river before her.

Brian picked up a small stone and tried skipping it across the water; it bounced once then disappeared into the current.

Jonny took up the game right away, though his rocks didn’t bounce and instead he began to see how big of a splash he could make.

After several minutes, we decided to follow the creek downstream and do some exploring. There was another pathway along the water’s edge, so we got in a single file line and began hiking once more on a worn dirt path. As we journeyed the creek widened and slowed to a gentler pace. The roar of the rapids died down and was replaced by the sounds of calling birds and insects. We passed a rope swing that could be used to jump into the river and an odd tree with a cactus growing on top of its mossy bark.

Twenty minutes passed before we decided to take a break. We’d never hiked this far before and we were all tired. Fifty feet off the trail we found what looked like a natural Bathtub; the creek emptied into a little inlet that was separated from the rest of the water by a few large rocks.

We took off our shoes and got our feet wet, walking from stone to stone and then splashing into the cold clear water.

Mom took out some snacks and drinks for the family. She was always prepared for hungry kids. I guess with having four kids she learned pretty quick that having food on hand was a necessity.

We sat back with our crackers and Capri Suns and talked about our adventure. It wasn’t long before we decided to head home, it had been a long walk, especially for Alicia who wanted to be carried now, and the sun was getting closer to setting. But it had been a good day, and even though I’ve been on many journeys to Barton Creek since then, I’ll still always remember that special day.

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The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

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Have you ever had a bad day? I know I sure have. Most people do. There are some days where everything seems to go wrong.

Well, the other night I went to go see Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. Although the title seems a little over the top, this movie was actually quite good. It struck at something that most people go through in life, at least eventually: a bad day. A day when everything that could go wrong does, and you just have to deal with it. I enjoyed the fact that a lot of the things that went wrong in the plot of this movie were ordinary things, but when piled on top of each other, they turn into something that’s really hard to deal with. (Just like in my own life). I know I’ve had my days where it seemed like I was being overwhelmed with all the little things going wrong.

But this movie included a positive message, and I didn’t find it cliche. The message was not “be positive and you’ll automatically get what you want, or everything will work out,” but more like, “stick together through the tough stuff.” Bad days are hard, and your attitude may be able to help, but one of the biggest things that helps is going through it with someone else.

Oddly enough, this is also what stuck with me from my church’s sermon on Sunday. Our pastor mentioned the fact that we should have joy in suffering with Jesus, or in joining in His sufferings. I never really understood that before. How is both of us suffering a good thing? Why should I want that? Hasn’t Jesus suffered enough for the both of us? I always took it to mean that Jesus was with me when I was suffering. But then my pastor said, when you suffer together you’re relationship deepens. And it just clicked. Like of course! You have friends that will have fun with you, and stick with you on your good days. But the people who stick with you in the hard stuff, that’s who you’re really close to. And that’s how close I want to be with Jesus.

Just like in the movie, the family drew closer together through all the hard stuff. This realization brought to mind another show I had recently rewatched: Band of Brothers. This TV show follows the story of a group of men who served together in WWII and details all that they went through together. Even though it was horrible stuff, it made their relationships supper deep, to where they really felt like brothers; like family.

So, maybe this week, you’ve had a bad day, or several bad days, but maybe if you step back and look at the relationships you have, and remember what you have to be thankful for, those bad days, as Alexander said, “can help you appreciate the good ones.”

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A Church Family

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I’ve been thinking recently about my church and I wanted to share some thoughts.

Here’s a starter question. On a Sunday morning, would you rather go to some event or entertainment venue for half price, or go to church?

Recently I had a friend suggest that I should go to an entertainment venue on Sunday morning because it was half price. I didn’t say yes or no at the time, I just listened to the suggestion.

As I see it, you could have three different responses to this question. 1. You could say, “Yeah I’d like the half price coupon.” 2. You could say “Well I should probably go to church, but that sounds fun.” 3. Or you could say, “Miss Church? No way! I wouldn’t miss this for anything!”

Now I don’t know where you would fall on the scale, but I lean towards the third option. I hardly ever miss church, and not just because I feel like I’m supposed to go there and will feel guilty if I don’t. I go, because I want to. I get to see my good friends, be encouraged and prayed for, and hear about the great things God is doing in our congregation. It is a sweet time, with my family. And I really would call the members of my church my family.

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When I step into the school building where we meet, it feels like coming home, I get hugs, smiles, and “How are you’s?” and it lifts my spirits. If I had a bad week, I can tell someone about it, if I had a great one, I can share that too.

I read a blog post recently about a church’s first impression. The post mentioned if the technical equipment works, if everyone knows the songs, or if the preaching was thought out and well prepared.

I get all that, and it is important. But more so, I think what really matters in a church, and really makes the best first impression, is when someone actually says hello to you, shakes your hand, maybe gives you a hug and asks how you are. That’s what family does.

Now maybe your church doesn’t feel much like family, maybe you want to slip in and slip back out without getting noticed or talking to anyone. But that is not what Jesus intended for His church. The church is His body, and it needs to be connected in order to function.

So I would encourage you, if you attend church, to start treating the people there more like family. Say “hi,” ask how you can be praying for the person sitting next to you, and maybe even take someone out to eat after church and get to know them better.

Well that’s my thoughts for the day. Let me know what you think.

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