NovelSisters

watching, reading, and writing stories

Maturity

I’ve been thinking recently about what it means to be mature. There are many different expectations that people have for a ‘mature’ person. In our American culture, there seems to be an unwritten expectation that to be mature, or considered a real adult, you must be able to afford your own place to live, and support yourself financially. For many people, this just isn’t the case, either from poor job availability, or the expenses of an apartment or house, sometimes you just can’t make it on your own.

Now maybe living by yourself isn’t the real test when it comes to maturity, maybe it’s being smart, knowing the answers to lots of problems, or being confident in yourself, but either way I think our culture has a real obsession with independence. When you can do what you want, when you want, that means you’re grown up. It means you can make your own decisions and take care of yourself. Isn’t that what being an adult is all about?

I don’t want to say all of this is wrong, I think working and contributing to society is important. But something my pastor said last week has been stuck in my head. “Maturity is measured in dependence on Christ, not independence.” As humans we want control, we want our way, we’re selfish and self-centered and obsessed with getting what we want. But when we are in Christ, we put to death this old way of thinking. Instead we recognize that it isn’t about us and we have never been in control and never will be. God is the One who holds it all together and His plan is the one that will come to pass. And the more mature we become in Christ, the more we are okay with that. We are happy to let God have control and to rely on His help and guidance in all things. The more we depend on Him and not ourselves, the more mature we become.

I’ve seen this at work in my own life. When I try to be independent, and make my own plan for the day happen, every little hindrance gets me so frustrated and short-tempered and I can end up acting like a little kid who didn’t get their way. But when I give up my desire for control to God, and trust Him with how the day will go, I find that all the little unexpected bumps don’t matter. He already knew that traffic jam would happen, or that mess I need to clean up would occur. And He has a purpose for me in it. Then I can sit patiently, knowing He will get me where He wants me, when He wants me to be there. And some of those interruptions, are actually opportunities to do His work, show His love, be kind and display His glory to those around me.

So anyway, I hope my ramblings have encouraged you today and reminded you that you don’t have to have everything together or always know what to do or take care of yourself. Let go, and let God be in control and trust that He will work things out in the best way.

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A Poem

So I was struggling with what to write today and ended up looking through old assignments from college. I came across this old poem. I had started it, but never fully finished it. Or at least when I read it, some things just obviously needed to be changed. So I fixed it up a bit and now I’d like to share it with you.

Please enjoy!

Life’s River

It only flows one way; forward,
Always towards the sea of history
Sometimes it rushes
through rapids
You can barely
hang on
Other times it is stagnant,
Like the last day of school before summer begins
At times you can see the waterfall ahead
Even if you don’t see it, you feel the current
Pulling you towards the drop
You know it’s coming
But you cannot stop
The free fall
Where it all falls apart
But you have to keep going with the flow
Knowing you will lose control and come crashing down
It comes steadily closer no matter how much you fight the current
Sometimes you get trapped in the backflow
Keep reliving that moment,
Even though everything
Keeps moving toward the sea
But eventually
You will get there,
And join the lives of so many others
Rivers lost in the ocean of eternity

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Bridge of Spies and Worry

Bridge of Spies

A couple weeks ago I got to watch the Bridge of Spies with my family. It was a very well done movie and if you like dramas, or historical films, you’d love this one. Tom Hanks always does a fantastic job in his movies and this one is no exception. I loved the story and the characters, but the one thing that stuck out to me from the whole movie was a line that Rudolf Abel says several times. He is a Soviet sent to America to serve his country. In his eyes he has done nothing wrong. But he gets caught up in all of the drama of the Cold War and is accused of being a spy and even threatened with death. Then he is sentenced to jail and later offered as an exchange for an American prisoner. But in all of the tough circumstances he constantly maintains a calm attitude. Throughout the movie other characters ask him, “Aren’t you worried?” and he responds calmly, “Would it help?”

And does it? I know I’ve spent a lot of my time worrying about little things that don’t even matter, and does it make a difference at all? No, not really. Worry accomplishes nothing, it helps no one. And even though I know this, I often still do it. So how do we stop it?

Well while I was in Mozambique, I shared a Bible story with the children about this exact thing. After acting out a skit with a fellow team member where she was really worried, I read them these verses:

“Then Jesus said to his disciples: “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. For life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest? “Consider how the wild flowers grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you—you of little faith!” -Luke 12:22-28 NIV

After sharing these verses, I prayed with the actor, and told the kids that instead of worrying, we could be thankful. Then the whole team helped the children make flowers out of pipe cleaners and construction paper. And I told them that they could write things they were thankful for on the flower petals to remind them not to worry and that God could take care of them.

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And I think that’s the real issue with worry. Worry comes when we think we are in control and we can change our circumstance by doing something. So we get ourselves all worked up thinking about all the things we can do, to make sure it goes the right way (our way). We try to predict what could go wrong and how to fix it. We might even try to make sure everyone is happy. But in the end we only wear ourselves out and often no matter how much we planned or worried or stressed, it still doesn’t come together the way we hoped.

I think the reason that Rudolf Abel was not worried, was that he knew and accepted that he was not in control. He didn’t stress about his circumstances because he knew he couldn’t change them. And I think when we do the same thing with God and accept that He is the one in control, not us, then it’s a lot easier to relax and stop worrying. Because ultimately God is in control and what He has planned is good. It may not be what we expect or want, but it is good. And I think that’s one of the big things I learned from going to Mozambique. I didn’t try to be in control while I was on the trip. I just held my plans loosely and laughed when they got changed. I didn’t worry about what I would say in front of a large group, or how a Bible lesson would come together, I simply trusted God and did my best. And it was so freeing.

So I want to encourage you today. You don’t have to worry either, God is in control of your life and He has the best plan. So trust Him, and if you’re still having trouble with worry, ask someone to pray with you.

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Texas Poetry

The other day I was looking through old pictures with my sister. It was fun to reminisce and see all these moments from my life captured on film. So I decided to post a poem that I wrote several years ago. I hope you enjoy it.

Horse, Animal, Mammal, Riding, Equestrian

Image Source

February 2, 2012

Life’s Gait

I used to take riding lessons
in the dust of a parched Texas summer.
The steady beat and swift breeze
kept me circling the worn path.

Click of the tongue,
nudge to the stomach,
tug on the reigns,
up and down with the motion.

Sometimes we canter quickly,
sometimes we walk slow,
but always we must move.
We cannot stop the flow

round the earth,
round the sun,
the motion of time,
since life first begun.

We like to think
we have control,
that our choices determine
where we will go.

Then in the air, all
power stripped away

hit the hard ground
wondering what went wrong

Did I lose control
or ever even have it?

Legs shake as I rose, to face
my choice.

Do I sit out on life?

Or jump back in?

It will keep moving,
whatever my decision.

I could fall again,
and break more than my pride.
But is security worth the price,
of losing out on life?

I climbed back on,
determined to keep in mind
that despite my lack of control,
life is still a fun ride.

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The Christian’s Line for Entertainment

I had a long conversation the other day about where to draw the line when it comes to participating in entertainment. As a Christian, I care about what I put into my mind and what I let my eyes see. But I also want to be able to connect with the people around me, and sometimes that means watching a movie together, or discussing a TV program.

Children, Tv, Child, Television, Home, People, Boy

Image Source: https://pixabay.com/en/children-tv-child-television-home-403582/

As I thought about it, I developed the idea of a line, with the middle being where you would ideally stay. At one extreme of the the line there’s some pretty obvious things that a Christian should not be looking at, like sex, porn, black magic, sorcery, that kind of stuff. My standard for what I allow myself to watch in this area rests on how it makes me feel. If the scenes, (whether it involves magic, sex, or bad language) is making me feel uncomfortable, or if I feel guilty after watching it, I try to avoid seeing them. I think what you allow yourself to watch can vary from person to person, but no one should do what they “feel” is wrong. We need to listen to the Holy Spirit’s leading.

In the middle of our line we have a basic enjoyment of some kind of entertainment, with no feelings of guilt or obsession.

But if you keep going towards the other end of the line, you can start to idolize the entertainment that you’re enjoying. In the past I thought of “fangirls” as simply being people who enjoy a certain actor or show or whatever and I didn’t see anything wrong with it. But as I thought about it more, “fangirling” can easily become idol worship where the thing that is so exciting has become what your life is all about.

I think this side of the extremes goes more easily unnoticed to Christians. We immediately notice if a show or book has “sex scenes” in it, or bad language. But do we also notice if our enjoyment of some kind of entertainment has gotten out of hand? I’ve definitely been caught in this, making my whole day revolve around the show that comes on at 7, or the movie that’s finally coming out.

It’s a good idea to remind ourselves not to slip in either direction and to keep a balanced life, with our focus strictly on the Lord.

I think this verse sums it up well; “Everything is permissible for me”-but not everything is beneficial. “Everything is permissible for me” – but I will not be mastered by anything. -1 Corinthians 6:12 NIV

Whatever I allow myself to watch, I want it to be beneficial, and something that won’t start to control me.

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